Beyond Talk Therapy: Somatic Safety & Healing
“Maybe the only enemy is that we don’t like the way reality is now and therefore wish it would go away fast. But what we find… is that nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.”
We’re often taught that if we can just think our way through our fears, we can conquer them.
As someone who values reason and logic, I’ve spent years helping clients deconstruct anxieties, reframe unhelpful narratives, and talk through “what-ifs” and worst-case scenarios. These are common tools in thought-based treatments like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
They’re useful, evidence-based, and nearly universally applicable…
But only “nearly.”
Unfortunately, there are times when “talk therapy” won’t seem like enough — when you’ve done all of the mental work, but you don’t feel any better.
Why might this happen?
Let me share a personal story…
Recently, I found myself in exactly that kind of situation.
There I was, in the middle of a phone call, when I noticed a blind spot just off-center in one eye.
In a split-second, I thought, “Huh, that’s new,” vowed to message my doctor’s office later, and shifted focus back to my call.
Some time and many visual tests later, I found myself sitting in a sterile exam room waiting for a specialist ophthalmologist to decide whether I needed eye surgery — an emergency procedure that would put me facedown and out of work for “weeks to months.”
Facedown.
Out of work.
Weeks to months.
To say clinical logic failed me is neither accurate nor sufficient.
Rationally, I knew what was about to happen. That didn’t stop me from feeling intense emotions.
You can know the statistics, the surgeon’s expertise, the reason for a procedure — yet still experience dread.
You can tell yourself “you’re in good hands, you’ll be okay” — yet still freeze with fear.
What I felt wasn’t the result of maladaptive thinking. It was my nervous system doing its job: trying to protect me from a perceived vulnerability that also happened to be visceral, life-changing, and real.
These types of emotions are existential in nature, not the product of distorted thoughts or skewed perceptions.
This is the limit of talk therapy.
“ex·is·ten·tial (adj.):
of or relating to existence...”
Why isn’t it enough to just “talk it out”?
It’s not that CBT failed me outright — it’s that CBT wasn’t the right tool to help me in that moment.
Cognitive-based talk therapy is powerful exactly because it teaches you to fact-check your way through unproductive fears. I will always advocate using reason to combat the unreasonable.
But I also acknowledge this can fall short in situations involving actual physical or visceral threats, which may be perfectly reasonable to feel anxious about.
These dangers aren’t “in your head” or “irrational.” You can’t logic them away.
In the case of somatic injury and trauma, these experiences are rooted in what’s happening in — or to — your body.
They are tangibly real, and your brain is hard-wired to respond to real threats.
What does your brain have to do with this?
When you encounter a threat, your “survival instinct” kicks in, and your brain activates a survival response of neurochemicals to “save” you.
Central to this process is the amygdala.
It doesn’t care about logic. It only cares about surviving the danger in front of you.
It does so by blocking ALL cognitive processes that aren’t survival-critical — like planning, problem-solving, and organizing.
It’s like a circuit breaker; once a threat grows from “worrisome” to “possibly life threatening,” the rational part of your brain turns off, and survival reflexes take over.
Your amygdala prioritizes survival-critical emotions like fear and anger, and triggers survival-critical actions like the fight/flight/freeze response.
“Thinking will not overcome fear, but action will.”
Here’s the truth: when you can’t count on your body to be safe, your amygdala demands action, not rationalization… this is why “talk” alone isn’t enough.
What you feel in that moment is your nervous system doing its job: protecting you from harm.
In the case of a major medical procedure, your body is preparing for a literal invasion.
In the case of chronic health issues or traumatic grief, your nervous system may be stuck in perpetual overwhelm trying to process old losses and guard against new ones.
You can't ‘talk your nervous system’ out of a biological reflex.
Trying to do so only creates more internal stress because your mental narrative is effectively misaligned with your bodily experience.
To self-regulate, you must restore your sense of safety in a way that doesn't require words.
This is where somatic therapies come in.
Meet your body where it's at — in sensations, in the physical world — and create safety there.
Meet your body where it's at — in sensations, in the physical world — and create safety there.
What is somatic therapy?
Somatic therapy differs from cognitive therapy in that it takes a “bottom-up” approach rather than a “top-down” one:
Top-down therapies work on healing mind-to-body. These use cognitive experiences — mental processes like thoughts, beliefs, expectations — to effect change in how you feel and act.
Bottom-up therapies work on healing body-to-mind. These use bodily experiences — physical sensations, nervous system activation — to effect mental and emotional change.
Top-down and bottom-up approaches together comprise holistic mind-body healing. As such, both are critical for integrative wellness.
Examples of specialty somatic therapies:
- Somatic Experiencing (SE)
- Somatic Eye Movement Desensitization & Reprocessing (EMDR)
- Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)
- Sensorimotor Psychotherapy
...and more!
Where does somatic work fit in if you’re used to doing talk therapy?
To be clear, I am NOT a “somatic therapist.”
What I am is an “eclectic” practitioner who draws from many different therapeutic styles, not just CBT. This allows me to integrate mindfulness and somatic exercises when clients need to re-establish safety within themselves first.
In my practice, this is helpful for clients who feel particularly stuck in survival-mode levels of mental, emotional, and physical distress, and are experiencing psychosomatic symptoms as a result.
My favorite somatic tools fall into 2 broad categories:
1. Grounding exercises
These rely on awareness to help “pause” your nervous system and anchor you within the boundaries of your body.
These skills include:
Breathwork
Body scans
Progressive muscle relaxation
Self-hugs (weighted blankets count too!)
Orienting
2. Mindful movements
These rely on intentional “shifting” of physical energy to remind you that you’re safe and in control of your body.
These skills include:
Somatic shaking
Walking meditations
Stretching
Yoga or tai chi
Dance
Whether you’re facing a medical procedure, a big life change, or just a season of heavy dread, these exercises can help move your nervous system from knee-jerk survival mode to a quieter state, where you have room to pause, steady, and reorient yourself to what you need in the moment.
“…What we habitually regard as obstacles are not really our enemies, but rather our friends. What we call obstacles are really the way the world and our entire experience teach us where we’re stuck... Whether we experience what happens to us as obstacle and enemy or as a teacher and friend depends entirely on our perception of reality. It depends on our relationship with ourselves.”
Remember:
The goal of all somatic work is self-regulation — to settle your nervous system and bring it back in balance with your body.
This is the way to restore safety through your mind-body connection.
Try this technique: the physiological sigh
- Inhale deeply through your nose at a normal pace until your lungs feel full.
- Then inhale again a second time, taking a quick sip of air to completely fill your lungs.
- Exhale slowly and completely through your mouth.
- Repeat at least 1-3 times, or as long as needed.
When done correctly, this exercise, also known as cyclic sighing, can lower your heart rate and soothe anxiety in just a few minutes.
At the end of the day, remind yourself that you’ve navigated uncertainty before, and you can find safety again.
Try these affirmations:
"I can trust my body to reveal what it needs." "I am listening to what my body has to say." "I am safe in this moment." "I can sit with discomfort without being consumed by it." "I am more than just my survival response."
As I sat in my exam chair, bracing for possible surgery, I was reminded that feeling safe and being "well-regulated" doesn't mean being "fearless."
Safety isn't the absence of fear.
Safety is a supportive internal environment that gives you courage to do scary things, and resilience to bounce back no matter what happens.
Self-regulation means having tools to sit with that fear without being consumed by it.
Beyond somatic practices, this can mean simplifying grounding routines, setting boundaries for your priorities, and letting your nervous system rest.
It may look like connecting intentionally with people you trust, or finding new supports who can offer new forms of safety.
Most of all, it means recognizing and giving yourself grace for the fact that this fear isn’t a failure — it’s a sign that your body is working as intended to keep you safe.
In those moments, it’s okay to stop talking with your mind and start listening with your body.
Don’t minimize what you’re experiencing. Learn from it.
Work with your nervous system rather than against it.
Show yourself that you’re safe. Your nervous system may just follow.
While I’m not a somatic specialist, I deeply value mind-body techniques and mindfulness in general.
As we enter National Stress Awareness Month this April, it’s never been more obvious to me that understanding your physical experiences can shed light on how you process emotionally difficult moments.
It can also signal when you may need a little extra care and support.
Whether you’re going through acute physical challenges, chronic illness, or existential overload, know that you don’t have to push through alone.
If you’re interested in exploring somatic exercises as a part of talk therapy, please schedule a complimentary 10-minute phone consultation with me here.
It would be my honor to provide a safe space for you to explore integrative approaches that better support whole mind-body health.
Disclaimer: This blog is intended for informational purposes only, and does not constitute medical or psychiatric advice. Please consult with a qualified healthcare professional directly for personalized guidance and support.